What I hadn’t banked on would be how when you are open and honest and being your true authentic self, how freeing that feels. I felt empowered. I felt brave.
The 4th January 2011 was a big day for me indeed. First of all I would go on my very first date with a woman and secondly I’d have a meeting about a comedy project.
Over a snowy December I had shared correspondence (yes, emails but correspondence sounds more romantic) with a woman, similar age, similar job and she loved long emails. So I had a great time writing to her and looked forward to receiving her responses. If I’m honest I wasn’t attracted to her in the photos online, but I was enjoying my new pen pal.
Second of all, through my new found brave new self I contacted a gay comedian through Twitter and asked if I could email her regarding an idea for a comedy show for her to star in. Amazingly she passed on her email and we set a date to meet for a coffee.
First came the date which was lovely and easy, because it wasn’t really a date in the end, just a lovely lunch. It was clear we didn’t fancy each other, but we got to have a good old natter. Turns out the day before she’d met who would become her girlfriend, so it was never meant to be, her and I, but after my rocky start with the clicky unfriendly lesbians calling me a tourist, this gave me hope that there were some good ones out there.
Next came coffee with the comedian. It was good, but disappointing as it turned out my idea wasn’t an unique as I thought it was and the comedian was already in the midst of working on a similar idea. I was miffed, but chuffed with myself I had been brave enough to set up the meeting. It had been a good day.
It did make me realise however that my straight conditioning still existed in the background, when after rummaging around in her bag at the cafe, the comedian pulled out a pair of socks and loudly exclaimed ‘I am such a lesbian’, to which I looked round to see if anyone had heard, momentarily remembering we were sitting in a gay café and batted an eyelid.